Camden is here!
I have had the hardest time starting this post because I can’t quite find the words to describe my experience of entering into motherhood.
I will just start by telling the story. Because I don’t want to forget.
On Monday Oct. 3, I went into my doctor’s office because I was feeling a little off. Not sure of what was exactly wrong with me, I just knew that something wasn’t right. They did the routine pee in a cup, weight, and blood pressure thing and that’s when we found it. My blood pressure was up. It wasn’t high to most people, but for me, who normally has a pretty low “normal” blood pressure, it was high. The doctor I saw (my regular OB was on vacay) said that she wanted to watch me in the hospital for a few hours on some monitors and to run some blood work. I was totally freaked out. I called Nate as the nurse wheeled me across the property to the hospital. He freaked out. Within 15 minutes, he was by my side.
I stayed in the hospital that night because my BP was going nowhere and I couldn’t shake a headache that I had. That was a bad night.
The doctor discharged me the next day with orders to make an appointment at my office to see another doctor to have my BP checked. When I went in that morning my BP was still up so it was strict orders of bed rest for me. I had my regular appointment with my regular doctor scheduled for the next day so on Thursday, it was round 3 for me! I was exhausted in every way by this point. My doctor said that he thought I had a virus and to remain on bed rest. Now if you know anything about me, you know that bed rest might as well have been a prison sentence. It was miserable.
I was back in the office on Monday the 10th. This time my blood pressure was sky high. So after a week of bed rest not working, my doctor said what I had been waiting to hear. It was time to induce. I called Nate frantically, and he was on his way. All of the family members were informed and were ecstatically loading up to come meet baby.
By 10 am I was in a hospital gown, hooked up to all the monitors, and was being prepped for an IV.
After 3 tries and almost passing out I was hooked up to pitocin and my water had been broken. Labor was on its way.
And I had one nervous and anxious papa going through it with me.
Family and friends slowly trickled in to offer their support. But labor was going nowhere. It could have been the fact that my body knew my parents had been camping in Kentucky and had to load up and pull the trailer back as fast as possible. Or the fact that nothing in the pregnancy had gone easily so why did I think that labor would.
After spending 6 hours at 4 centimeters and my epidural wearing off (Thank you Ash for holding my hand through this part) my doctor told me that we were looking at the possibility of a C-Section. I cried. I did not want a C-Section. I wanted to give birth to this child the way that I had mentally prepared. And I guess he wanted to come when he heard the word surgery because labor picked up.
At about 8:30 we were told that it was time to push and my family was asked to leave. I was so excited to be so close to meeting the child that had been living inside of me for 9 months.
This is the look of exhaustion plus joy at the fact that baby boy is on his way!
After about 30 minutes of good pushing, the doctor was called in and all of the tables were set up. The room became very busy.
At 9:33 on October 10, Camden was born. I became a mother and Nathan became a father. And I flel more in love with Jesus for giving me this precious gift than I had ever had before.
In that moment, I became whole.
After he was born, all of the family got to come back in and we spent about an hour passing him around and sharing in his precious goodness.
And we settled into being a family of three.
I could not tell you in words how I am changed. My life now has meaning, and my purpose is revealed. I look at the gospel totally different. There is no way that I could give my baby up to die, but God did. Oh how he loves you and me. He loves us enough to let a precious boy be born like my sweet one only to die to cover our sins. That’s love.
Camden, your mommy and daddy are mad about you.
