This Is The Story-Part 5

The last part. It feels so good to be at this part. Especially after living through what we went through, this part was welcomed.

To be frank, I had a very hard time recovering from the accident. Thats what we call the whole incident around our house. I survived when it was actually going on but afterwards it all sank in just what my family had gone through. I was worried that people would view us differently if they ever knew what our family had been investigated for. I took everything personally. Because when social workers have to come to your house and look around to make sure it is a fit place to raise a child, you take it personally.

So I began to pray for a new start. I asked the Lord to give us something to renew the spirit of our family. I was so depressed that I didn't want to face another year. The thought of having to see February 13 again terrified me. What if something happened again? I couldn't face that valley again.

I begged and pleaded with the Lord to take the sad feelings that I was having away. It wasn't healthy for me to feel the things I felt. I had (and at moments still have) a lot of anger towards the doctor who rushed to the decision that Nathan had abused our child. I was mad at the hospital for not being more careful when they hired personelle. I was just plain mad.

In June, Nathan took a trip to Zambia, Africa. While he was gone I took a trip to Gulf Shores with my family. I felt a little emotional the whole time. But my name is Whitney and I struggle with my emotions. There I said it.

I snuck off to Wal-Mart one day because I needed some time alone. I wondered if I was emotional for another reason. Could I be pregnant?

Nathan arrived home the day after Father's Day. Camden and I met him at the airport. Camden had something very important to tell his daddy. Not only did he want to tell him that he missed him and he loved him but he wanted to announce that he was going to be a...

Nathan was just as shocked as I was when I found out. Believe me when I say that we were not trying for another one. Because when you are recovering from the DCS system's run around, lawyer fees, and other baggage that the accident left, you don't try for a baby.

But we welcomed the surprise. Children are a gift from the Lord. And we like gifts!

So we scheduled our Ob/Gyn appointment. When we went our doctor was surprised to see us. It had only been 8 months ago since we had given birth to Camden. They did the routine pee in a cup, blood work, and question stuff. Then we got to go in for an ultrasound.

In that room, the last measured Baby and gave us an approximate due date. We saw the doctor once more after that and he calculated our due date based on my last period.

We are due-

February 13, 2013.

The day of the accident just one year prior.

The Lord heard my prayers and answered. Just like He had the whole time through. I asked for something to make that day, that season, better. And if welcoming a new little one into our family isn't that answer then I don't know what is.

Sometimes I think that if we had never gone through the accident then I never would have prayed for something like this. If the accident had never happened then it was possible that I would have seen this new baby as an inconvenience, not an answer to a prayer. But sweet Jesus knew what He was doing and would do the whole time.

We are thrilled to be a part of this story. The Lord is a master of a writer and He is writing out a greater story bigger than we ever could have ourselves. So please pray for us as we prepare to be a family of 4. A family who is at the mercy of the Lord's plans. Trusting Him is very twist and turn of this story that we call life.

This Is The Story- Part 4

 Part 1
Part 2
Part 3

Yesterday's post was hard. I cried when I wrote it, and I cried when I went back and re-read it over and over again. It doesn't bring up any good feelings. But the Lord's glory is revealed in today's part.

On Thursday, we were supposed to hear from DCS. So we waited. And we waited. And while we waited we prayed for Camden. We stopped praying for our family. Up until this point we prayed that DCS would go away and we would be just like any other patient at LeBonheur- there to get the help they needed until it was time to go home.

We prayed that Camden would rest. People were constantly poking and prodding him. I was tired of seeing him be woken up. He needed to rest if he was going to heal. And you don't hurt while you sleep so I wanted my baby to sleep.

Oddly enough, this day was the day that the x-rays stopped, and he had a long bone scan in which he was wrapped up like a mummy and slept like one too. He smiled at us after his nap. At that moment, I was reassured that the Lord was with us in Room 1023.

The day ticked on and we heard nothing from DCS. We didn't know if no news was good news or if they were lining up foster care for our child. Because foster care was mentioned. We went to bed that night praying for a miracle the next day. We had no hand in this. We were at the mercy of the system. A system that is full of sinful people who look at cases like ours and do what they need to do and move on. We were just a number to them. Not the Russell's. The youth minister and the special needs teacher. Nope. They didn't care about our hearts. They just "wanted to do what was best for the child." So we prayed and went to bed.

On Friday we woke up with a renewed spirit but with nervous hearts. We first saw one of Cam's doctors and she told us that they would be discharging us. I was excited but I knew that we couldn't leave until we had heard from DCS.

And we did.

The two women that we had spoken to days before came into our room with their supervisor. They sat us down and let us know what was going on. I will explain it the best I can.

They said that since Nathan had "harmed" our child and the doctor believes that it was a case of abuse, he could not be alone with Camden. They told us that they were recommending that Nathan have no contact with us at our home for 72 hours. They also said that this recommendation would go in front of a judge that day and he would vote on what he thought we should have to do. After the 72 hours, we would go to court, plead our case, and then get another verdict on what would happen to our family.

After their talk they left for court and we were to wait for them to return with our fate.

Of course, I crumbled. 72 hours no contact with my husband. My infant had 7 broken ribs and he couldn't be around to help. I needed him and he needed me! So we did the only thing we knew to do. We prayed. We hit our knees and begged the Lord for mercy on our family. My prayer the whole time had been that the Lord wouldn't allow our family to be separated. If ever I needed him to answer, it was now.

While they were gone we took some advice, got on the phone, and hired two lawyers. We knew that what we were about to face was bigger than we could handle alone.

About 4 o'clock there was a knock on the door. It was Mr. Supervisor here to give us the outcome.

He said-

The judge over turned the 72 hour recommendation and instead put into place a restraining order on Nathan. That restraining order stated that Nathan was not allowed to be alone with the baby and that he was to be supervised if ever with the baby. I did not count as supervision. But the judge did approve my mom and Nathan's mom. That meant that if Nathan wanted to come home, my mom would have to sacrifice and move in with us. We had a court date set for April 16. She would have to live with us until then.

But we didn't complain. Nathan was getting to go home with us. We were leaving the hospital as a family of 3. Well now 4 including Mom!

The Lord answered my prayer. He heard me.

They unhooked Baby Boy from all the wires and his IV. We checked out of the hospital and went home.

But thats when the trial really started for our family. I will make the details as short as possible.

We spent a lot of days in limbo. Our attorneys worked fervently to end this period of supervision as soon as possible but it still took forever. The court system brought in a Guardian ad Litem. This was the person who would represent Camden in the court. She would decide where Camden would go if it was decided that he couldn't remain with us. The district attorney was called over and over for an answer on if she was going to prosecute Nathan or not. Because there were two cases going on at the same time. One with the Department of Child Services and one with the state of Tennessee. If the state decided to prosecute and they won, Nathan would be a registered child abuser. In Tennessee, this is on the same list as sex offenders. I could see our life unraveling before our eyes.

We called and scheduled for a second medical opinion in Nashville. We did everything we needed to do to be ready in case we needed to go to court. We prayed all day every day.

The prayers were heard.

On March 24 we got a phone call from the lawyers. The DA had decided not to prosecute. The charges against the state were dropped and there was no chance that Nathan would be on any list.

About 30 minutes after that we got another phone call. The DCS social worker got word from the DA and they were also dropping all charges. The case was unfounded. There was not enough solid evidence to prove that any type of abuse happened.

The Lord heard my prayers. And again, he answered.

We went home to celebrate. My family was still in tact. Shaken, bruised, battered, weak, weathered, and weary, but we were in tact.

We were a family of 3 again. No one was coming to take my baby. He would remain at home with me and his daddy where he belonged. Because no one can love him as much as we do.

Our first picture as a family of 3 again. 

I still do not know why we had to go through this. I ask the Lord all the time for that answer. And I may never know on this side of heaven. But I know that I am a stronger person, wife, mom, and Christian because of it.

But the awesome part of the story is it doesn't end there. The Lord, in all of his mercy, chose to reveal Himself even more.

The last and final part tomorrow.

This Is The Story- Part 3

Part 1 

Part 2 

This part is the hardest to write. It brings back the worst day of my life. The rawest of feelings. Anger -so much so that it was sinful. Still is at times. A period of being lost and helpless. I am already crying just remembering. 

But I choose to remember because it was in this valley that the Lord carried me. He didn't speak to me. He didn't sing His song over me so that I could hear it. He simply carried me. And until you have been in the situation where you can do nothing but pray for the Lord's mercy on your family, you don't know what I am talking about. 

February 14. For me-Valentine's Day will never be the same. 

The day began with Nathan's family coming to our room and visiting. There isn't much to do but stare at the wall and pray for the pain to somehow cease when your 4 month old has broken ribs. So we carried on some small talk and prayed over his little body.

Nathan and I were urged to take a walk because we had not stepped foot out of the room or out of our son's reach in 15+ hours. We needed to hold hands and speak to each other privately. We decided to take their suggestion and began walking. We found ourselves 2 steps inside the gift shop when my mother-in-law called and told me that there was a doctor and a social worker waiting to speak to us. We ended our walk and returned to room 1023.

I wish we had just run away instead. We could never have imagined what we were about to experience.

 A doctor, a social worker, and a nurse practitioner stood on the side of my son's bed and looked at him. The doctor pocked and prodded him. She flipped him all sorts of ways. And he screamed. She did nothing to calm him. So I did the only thing I knew to do and that was get in his ear and whisper, "Shhhhhhhh. Mama is here and Jesus is holding you. Rest in the Lord baby." Over and over again I said this. I missed a lot of what was said between my husband and the professionals until they asked him what happened. The baby had calmed down and I returned to the conversation.

I heard my husband tell the story of what happened. The same story he told me. The same story he told our families. I felt so bad for him. Not only did he have to live it but now he was having to retell it. The social worker took notes the whole time, and the doctor seemed to be in another world.  They asked us personal questions about our jobs and such. When the conversation was coming to a close the doctor told us that babies don't just break ribs from falls. Something more has to happen. And this is when it sank in. They thought my husband had abused our child.

My husband would never hurt our baby. Or anyone for that matter. He is the most compassionate, understanding, calm, and level headed man in my life. He is not a child abuser.

The 3 women left the room and I fell to the floor. I lost it for the first time since being admitted to the hospital. I hit the floor, put my head between my knees, and I wept. A sweet friend happened to be there at the time and she held me and cried with me. I couldn't speak. I could only cry. I couldn't think. I could only cry. And then she began praying. When I couldn't, she did. Oh, how I am thankful for her.

I couldn't hear the Lord but I know that He held me too.

Moments later the room phone rang. It was the social worker. She said that she was sending two case workers from the Department of Child Services and an officer of the Memphis Police Department to our room. Nathan would need to speak to these people. When I hear DCS, I think losing my baby. And I lost my mind again. This time it took Nathan to calm me down.

In short, Nathan told the story of what happened to 2 case workers, an officer, a Lieutenant. He was taken to the police station in downtown Memphis in the back of a cop car where he told his story 2 more times. CSI, thats right-Crime Scene Investigation-, came to our room and took pictures of Camden and Nathan. They went to our house to get photos of the crime scene. Thats what they called my home. Talk about a shot to the heart. At 9:45 p.m I saw him again. We hugged and he reassured me it would all be ok.

The next day was full of tests. Camden had x-ray after x-ray. He blood was taken many times a day. He had a CAT scan and an hour long bone density scan. The doctor on our case even ordered for him to be tested for shaken baby syndrome. This was the hardest one of all for me to watch. They put drops in his eyes that made his pupils dilate. The drops burned his eyes so he screamed. The had to do 3 rounds of drops.

We heard nothing from DCS. It was torture.

Family and friends continued to rally around us. They sat in bed with Camden and read him books. Nathan's best friends knocked on the door one night at 8 o'clock with no warning just to show their support. People prayed with us and for us. We couldn't find the words to go to the Lord. We clung to the Holy Spirit and the promise that when we couldn't say what we needed to, the Spirit groaned for us on our behalf.

On Wednesday night we saw the doctor on our case for the last and final time. She entered the room to deliver the results of the bone scan. We had been told that if the test showed brittle bones then we would be off the hook. We didn't know what to expect. She sat us down, looked us in the eyes, and then began.

"The bone scan revealed 3 additional broken ribs. That brings the count to 7. In the x-ray I see some enzymes in his liver that are elevated. I also saw some spots on his chest that I am concerned about. Babies don't break ribs. Someone has to squeeze them."

And then she said the words that to this day I can not get out of my head. She looked at each one of us. She made a point to make eye contact.

Then she said, "You, or you, did this in a moment of rage."

Thats when it happened. Someone with a professional title said that one of us abused our child. There is no worse feeling in the world.

We were mad.

We were told the next day that we would hear from the DCS workers to let us know what would happen next.

To be continued...