Why We Aren't Adopting a Black Child

Racial tension and inequality is something I have always been aware of. Heck, I live in the deep south. The tension is there. But it has never had a direct affect on me.

Until now, that is.

When we made our decision to adopt, people gave their "oh wow. Bless your hearts for doing something so good" and their "congratulations! how old will they be?"

Then the process continued. We were really going through with this and not everyone agreed with our decision.

And then we got some cruel statements. Statements like "I can't believe you are bringing a black baby into our family" and "why don't you just have more...you make such cute kids" and then there was "why does it have to be Africa, white babies here need homes too."

My heart sank. It was the first time (and I know its far from the last) that racism took a bite at me. That sounds like I am on a high horse and have been naive to it, but thats just not true. My heart has been pained since I could understand the difference but I didn't know my roll in this social tug-o-war.

So I count it all up to being naive. People are so plagued with generational opinions on race and who is superior that they won't let their view point go long enough to see that thats just not the way it is anymore. People would rather chose to believe that races are meant to stay separate. They truly think that my two biological children will be damaged by having a bother or sister with a different skin color. Its just plain naive. And maybe even ignorant.

So no, we aren't adopting a black child.

We are adopting a child. End of story. Their skin happens to be brown (thats what we refer to it in this house) but thats just their color of their nationality.

We are adopting a child. A child who lives in an orphanage because their birth mother or father couldn't or wouldn't care for them. A child who has nothing to their name except their name. A child who has experienced more loss and reject than most of us in America ever will.

We are adopting a child. Because thats what Jesus told us to do. When we experienced Lesotho and we held beautiful brown children in our hands, when we saw the pain in their eyes, the longing in their bodies to be held...thats when we knew we were going to adopt from Africa. When Jesus spoke it to our heart.

I have heard so many times in this adoption that "love is color blind". I can't get over that statement. Some days I want to agree and some days I want to hit who ever coined it. No one is color blind. Not in this sense of the term. I know full well my child will have dark skin and I have light skin. I know that this will bring its own challenges especially as they get older. But I choose to love them. Not in spite of their skin color. Not look past their skin color. But them. I choose to love them. All of them. Their different color, their different hair, and the scars that they bring. I choose to love them.

So no. We aren't adopting a black child. Or a brown child. Or how ever else you want to define my child. But if you do chose to define them, please refer to them as a Russell child.