Submission

Submission to God and submission to my husband.

Why is that such a hard comcept to learn for a Christian girl? Especially one who is engaged to be married in a little more than 6 months.

Maybe it has to do with the fact that I am totally and 100% type A. I like to be in charge at all times. I make the decisions I want to make. I take the roads I want to take. And I say the things I want to say.

I have mentioned this funk that I have been going through several times before and now that I am seeing the top of the mountain that led me out of that valley I can honestly say that the biggest thing the Lord taught me was submission.

I have learned before and have always known that I need to submit my life to the Lord and His will for it. But what I hadn't learned, and did not want to learn, was submission to my groom. The man who is going to make the decisions for me and my family for the rest of my life.

I have heard that word so many times before but until it directly applied to me and my life I wrote it off as something I would learn later on down the road. Well now the time has come and after much prayer. anger. emotions. resilence. bargaining. I lost the battle. I happily laid down my guard of being in control and gave it to N. And suprisingly after the fight was all over and done with I have come to realize I was hungry to give that to someone. There is no better feeling than putting your trust in the one you love to take care of you and your family (one day.)

Submission to my Lord and submission to my groom. my love. my spiritual leader. my husband.

And at the end of the day, knowing that the two men who love me the most are in control I can rest in peace. Try to let go today. Its worth every minute of not being in control.