In honor of...

ME...

So today is my 21st birthday and I decided that I will list the 21 greatest things that have happened to me in my life and some of the things that I remember the most. In no particular order...

1. I am saved and love the Lord with all of my heart. Of everything that has happened to me...this is the all time most important.

2. I love chocolate. This is the cause of all of my weight fluctuations.

3. Joe Blow the Rag Man...my dad's most favorite thing to say. I can't wait to be a mom and teach this phrase to my kiddos so they can hate it as much as me.

4. I am finally out of that stage in which my mom is the most uncool person in the world and she is now my best friend and role model. Thanks mom for sticking around all those years and being a good role model to me when I didnt even deserve the food you put on the table for me.

5. Sweet tea, m&m's, and bread....give me one of these three and you've got a happy girl.

6. The Lord has blessed me with the man of my dreams.

7. When I was 5 I had my appendix taken out. Oooh memories.

8. I got a really bad spankin' when I was in 6th grade for forging my momma signature. Lets just say that that was the first and last time I ever tried that.

9. I loooove Christmas. Its my favorite.

10. I write color guard half time shows and I love it.

11. I was horrible in high school. But I thinks it is so interesting to look back on now and God has used everything that I went through to minister to young girls. So interesting to see how He works.

12. I played with baby dolls until I was in 8th grade. I am destined to be a mother.

13. At 18 I was introduced to my best friend. It was totally worth the wait.

14. My passion in life is work with and be around people with special needs. They are the light og my life.

15. I have a new found appreciation for cooking. I caught my stove on fire this year but that hasn't slowed me down.

16. I used to hate broccoli. Now I crave it. Weird huh?

17. I enjoy cleaning now.

18. I have had 3 dogs through my life. All 3 are my favorite dogs ever. I have had countless fish...none were successful under my care. One of which died just a day ago.

19. Pink has ALWAYS been my favorite color.

20. I went to NYC once and I am dying to go back.

21. I have loved every second of ever minute the good Lord has given me. Thank you Jesus.

In case you didn't know...

I KNOW WHAT I WANT TO DO!

I am getting tired of talking to people and when I tell then where I work (I am a rec. leader at a home for special needs children) their immediate comeback is (almost in a doubting, sympathetic voice)...

"Well at least this will help you make sure this is what you want to do."

This being working with special needs children all my life.

Attention to all you doubters out there: I KNOW WHAT I WANT TO DO.

Have you ever felt a calling from God? Because I have and he instilled a passion in my heart to work with these little people. This is my passion in life...I just want to make a difference.

So maybe its you who needs to be challenged to be sure that this is what you want to do. I'm not sure whatever this is in your life but when you find it let me know so I can ask you the same annoying questions that everyone keeps asking me.

"For I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord. "Plans to prosper you and not harm you. Plans to give you hope and a future."

This is the word I rest on. He knows my plans and He has been gracious enough to inform me about it.

How or Why?

So tonight at church our pastor talked about Christmas. Of course, he did. That is the topic of all sermons this time of year and let me set the record straight...I do love those sermons.

Tonight he was talking about the wise men and how they followed the star to baby Jesus. I had heard before that the star moved as they traveled and he also stated the many scientific cases that say that it was a comet, or some sort of constellation or something of that sort. But nonetheless, it moved.

Well this got me to thinking.

It bothers me that we always have to prove everything. People refuse to believe in God unless they have proof that He is real.

I think that that defeats the purpose of faith. We can't prove that God exists, not scientifically at least, but its our duty to prove it with our lives.

Anyways, I think that if and when we decide to stop trying to explain HOW the star moved, and instead start telling WHY it moved, then we would be making an accomplishment.

Science stays on Earth, my friends. We won't need it when we get to heaven. So stop trying to prove what our human pea-brain minds cannot comprehend. And just accept it for what it is...

an unexplainably beautiful mystery.

procrastination and bad luck meet...

And the Devil laughed.

Yes thats right. Let me explain...

The past week I went to Louisiana for Thanksgiving. With tons of school work on my mind I was prepared to kick its butt and get it all done.

Well once we were there and settled I went to the car to get my backpack. Once inside I was ready to hit the books. There was just one problem...

I forgot the notebook with all of my stuff at home. Oh yes. I did.

So I tried to get in touch with someone while I had internet to email me some stuff so that I could get some things done. NOPE. Everyone else was out of town.

And the devil laughed.

And then I thought...well I have to get a movie analysis done. I will just go get the movieat the store and watch it. What an amazing plan. I mean, what else am I going to do other than watch a movie. So I tried to recall some of the movies that were on the list. I could only remember 3.

The Titanic. Gone With The Wind. Wizard of Oz.

Two I have seen. One I have not. So I wanted to watch gone with the wind. Only NOONE carries that movie in stores. And when I say noone I mean noone. So I went to Wal-Mart and saw the Green Mile. "Hey, thats on the list," I told myself. So for $9 I bought it and watched it. And I loved it.

When I got home and ready to write I looked over my list just to make sure that The Green Mile was on there. Wwll it wasn't.

Again, the devil chuckled. And I cried.

This is my last week of school and if it wasn't I dont think that I would have made it through Satan's diabolical plan to bring me down.

Go on Satan. You aren't going to get me down. I may stumble but I will get back up.

thanks. giving.

The things I am the most thankful for. (In no particular order.)

God. Forgiveness. My Momma. Aunt Ash. My dad's guitar. Sunny Days. Sugar cookies with sprinkles. Grace. Nathan's stories. My daddy's hands. Sweet tea. MawMaw's greenbeans. Brandon's love for his little sis. The cross. College. Freedom. The Red. The White. The Blue. Counrty music. Youth. Lamps. Granny's talent. Nathan's family. Old friends. Formal dresses. Butterflies. Special Ed youngsters. Grandpaw's life lessons. Fun. Amanda. Phone calls. Trust.

And I am thankful to be alive.

Give thanks to the Lord for He is good. His love endures forever.

?espanol?

ok so I am doing school work with the tv on. thats when the most rediculous commercial came on. it was the regular commercial that we have all see atlease a million kagrillion times...you know, the one about you better upgrade your tv or you are out of luck when february comes. well it was that commercial but i didnt know that by what they were saying. No I had to look at the screen and see february (written in spanish) and 2009. thats how I knew.

that brings me to the point of this post.

to all you mexicans: we welcome you. we really do. i mean i would not know where i would be without all those times that your mexican food has comforted me. and oh taco bell. you are grand. but c'mon.

if you are going to live here-learn some friggin english. This is america and i think that its only right that we get to watch tv (commercials and all) in our own language.

i feel better now.

You? Me?

So tonight I am alone in my appartment. Its not unusual. Well I am usually not alone but often thats how I feel. But thats neither here nor there. But the quiet and solitude has gotten my mind to turning. And as I was fighting the screaming thoughts in my head, I just couldn't keep them in. I began to think...

Who are we? I mean...who am I? I know I am a college student, a daughter, a sister, and a lover of the Lord. But am I really who I want to be. I hope that its not just me but I have always had these dreams of who I wanted to be when I grew up. Well my 21st birthday is next month so I think that "grown-up" is a matter or weeks away and I am not at all who I always pictured myself as being. Some of my grown up dreams have come true and some I can't even see in the future.

So as I ponder I just think... Am I becoming who the Lord is making me to be? Or I am fighting His will and becoming the world?

Television and media has warped my mind into thinking that I need to be so many things and for so long I have strived for them. Now that I can just sit and let be, I can see that none of that matters. I think I am more afraid of going another day not being "grown up" in my faith then actually growing up. There is no way that I am going to face all that lies ahead without a solid foundation in the Lord.

So I pray with all conviction being laid out on the table that I would strive. Strive to push away all desires to be grown up in my fantasy world and instead run with a passion to grow up in a relationship with the only one that matters. The one title I have that secures my "grown up-ness" is saved. Thats me. Mature or naive. Sinner or saint. Thats me...saved.

And what a wonderful name to wear.

Hello November

November already....

Where did October go?

So Tuesday was my first day with my kiddos at my REAL job. And can I just say that I was so overwhelmed. I was just thrown in with no direction and was told to hang out with the kids. WOW. Thats harder done than said.

Lets see...
I was hit on by a resident
I was pushed around by one of the kids and.... (this next one is the big one)
I was put in as headlock by one of my blind kids.

I am usually great in a crisis and I can handle most kids but this time I had to yell to another worker to get help and she practically had to pry him off of me. And then she went on to tell me (casually of course) "Oh he does that all the time."

Lovely. I am looking forward to next time. I might just try to tap out and see if he will let loose.

Whew. It was a long first day. So day two is tomorrow and we shall see how that goes.

On a happier note...

I have started a workout called P90X. Can we say SORE! I have never done anything so vigorous in my life but its so worth it. I started 3 days ago and I can already see a difference. Don't believe me...wait until February and you will.

I am supposed to take "Before and After" pics (which I am going to) and I will save you the sore eyes by not posting the "Before" but you just wait until February. I am going to be skinny, skinny, skinny. So be excited. Because I sure am. Sore, but excited.

One of the best nights in a long time!

So this past Thursday I took Nate's little sister, Emily, to the Sugarland concert in Tupelo and it was grand. Ashton Shepherd opened the show and man the girl can sing. I am not a big fan of the songs she has on the radio but in person the girl can belt.

The Kellie Pickler came out. Now I have to say that Em was not excited about hearing her but when she got finished Emily was a new fan. I would say she is one of the most talented female singers that is out right now. I dare say that I am in love..kidding.

Anyhow, during her show she announced that after Sugarland performed she would be out signing autographs. So me and Em jumped on that. We planned it just right that when Sugarland went back for their encore, we would go get in line for Kellie's signing. Good idea, right? Well we weren't the only ones who had that same idea. But being the devoted new fans that we were we proceeded to get in line. Needless to say, and hour later this is the result of my wait.....drum roll please.........

Are you impressed. This is as good as I could get because the durn security guards were screaming NO PICTURES as I was taking this one. Oh well. I am pretty excited about my picture.

And now here is a picture of Sugarland. They were amazing and I am totally impressed by how good they are in concert. If you ever get the chance to go- GO!

Thats all for now.

b.l.e.s.s.e.d.

On days like today, I just sit back and I think about how lucky I am. I spent the whole weekend with Nate and his family and I'm not blessed just because of that but I am reminded how lucky I am.

Good ole Nate... I think I have laughed the whole day today. And let me just set the mood right for you to understand where I am coming from on this one.

Close your eyes and picture this...ok well you can't close your eyes but you get the drift.

Its a breezy, crisp October and not a cloud in the sky. I am looking cute (that always makes any girls day better...you are lying if you say it doesn't) and he is just him. No other explaination needed. We go eat at the mexican resturaunt and there is a buffet! Score! So we eat and then we go on to the mall to kill some time. We wonder into Barnes and Noble and we head straight to the Christian section.
*How lucky am I to have a guy who goes to the Christian section first. Score!

Continuing on....we meander the books and when we dont find anything that we absoutly have to have we go into the mall. I think that this is one of our favorite things to do because we get to people watch and just interact together. We at least its one of my favorite things. So we stroll and talk and stroll and talk.
*Once again, how lucky am I to have a guy who will put up with me stopping and staring at every jewelry store we come to. Score!

Ok so thats enough of our boring day but I will say that I am sitting in his office at church (can you believe he has his own office) and I am just blessed. I am the girlfriend of a boy who loves the Lord more than life itself and who treats me like a princess.

A beautiful day and a beautiful love...the love between God and man and man and woman.

Score!

Bite Me.

Well that must have been the thought that went through my head right before the psychic Keegan (who knew, a 5 year old autistic boy that is normally my all time favorite is a psychic) took a bite into my once pain-free arm.

Yes, thats right people. I got bit. Not like a small little nibble with some drool attatched. No I am talking about teeth marks bigger that a 50 cent piece. And did it hurt!

I can't ever recall ever being bitten in my life. Even when I was a little girl I was pretty well liked and the pearly whites of other youngsters stayed away from my appendages. Well today I lost my bite-free virginity.

Keegan branded me and hours later I am still feeling it.

You poor little arm. I will nurse you back to helth. And I promise in the process I will keep Keegan and his little chompers far, far away from you.

OUCH!

oh I forgot.

I totally forgot to mention that I GOT A JOB! (Can't you hear the choirs of angels singing behind that sentence?)

All by the grace and good will of God, I found a job at a place called Angel Garden. This is the only residential home in Mississip' and I applied for the rec job. And thats right people. You heard it here first....I got the position. I am the recreation planner for the kiddos and my job pretty much consists of planning activities and playing with kids in the afternoons. Could life get any better? I think not.

So there it is. Proof. Proof that God is good and good and good.

PEACE and LOVE. Until next time.

I deserve...

A mighty slap to the wrist. It has been exactly one month since I have written. Shame on me. I try so hard to be good at this thing but then life comes in and sweeps me right away and the world of blogging takes a back seat to.....

1. School- I have more projects then I can count. And I have come to the conclusion all that the professors meet once a month and schedule a day to give test because they all just happen to be given on the same flippen day! Gross, just gross.

2. Practicum- This is the best although it just adds more to my already jam packed schedule. I get to go to the elementary school in Starkvegas and work with about 9 autistic 5 and 6 year olds. And let me just say that they are precious. My world could be crashing down around me and then I walk in and they run and give me a hug and some how they bandage all my invisible boo-boos. Could life get any better than some kids who don't care about my faults love on me. Sometimes I think that I have been put on this earth to love on those with special needs but my bubble gets bursted and I think it may actually be the other way around. I am the one who needs the lovin' on.

3. Church- although I may not be his wife ( yet, smiling) I have been helping Nate with his church duties every Wednesday and some Sundays. There is something so special about working right alongside with the person you are in love with doing God's work together. Man, it couldn't get better. The kids are great and just want to be loved. But then again, who doesn't. The most exciting thing that we have done is we have started a once a month "Battle Royal: Adam vs Eve." The kids seem to l0ve this. Since it is impossible for us to have a weekly bible study we take one Wednesday out of every month and we worship and play games as a group and then we split up and I take the girlies and Nater takes the fellas and we hit the word. We get a rare opportunity to dive into specific gender related topics. So far we have talked about biblical womanhood and the fruit of the spirit. Wonderful.

So all of that to say that I am so blessed. I have seen the rocks of the valley this year but God has held my hand and has brought me out to stand on the mountain. I am so busy but you know, I don't think that I would want it any other way. I love my major and the people that I am meeting. God is good. End of story. Good friends, good family, good love= GOOD GOD! Period.

Hebrews...

So I am doing this Bible study...A Call to Die by David Nasser. WOW! Thats all that I can say about it. It is amazing. In todays study we were to read out of Hebrews 11. This was all about faith. The author listed people after people who all had different outcomes because of their faith. Some we would say are good outcomes and some not so pleasant. But nevertheless, they all resulted in eternal life. How much better can you get. All he asks us to do it just believe and thats it. Now I understand that with believing come suffering and discipline (Hewbrews 12 discusses this-also a muct read!) but when looking at the big picture, IT IS TOTALLY worth it. Jesus had faith in the fact his suffering would bring us salvation and He swallowed that. Today I think that when we hear suffering we dont even want to smell it. C'mon Christians. (I am speaking to myself here.) He died for us. We havent even tasted death and we are scared.

OK soapbox over.

Hebrews 11= a must read!

return of the boring blogger

ok so I doubt if anyone even reads this but just incase you are do find your reading (and bless your heart if you are) then I will try not to be too boring.

so here is an update of ole starkville...or vegas as i like to call it.

1) it has been a bit weird getting used to the fact that I am on my own...i have to cook for myself, clean up after myself, and even bathe myself....ok ok i was just kidding with that one.

2) i think it should go down in the record books, but i have a newfound appreciaton for football. i have been going to the games (with my cowbell in hand may i add) and i shake that thing like i am the fan of fane.

3) special education is HARD. when i first started my classes i thought to myself, "oh this is a breeze." well karma must have heard me and soon began to kick my little hiney....or should i say-big hiney-as it has grown here lately. my teachers all talk so fast with so much information that is foreign to me that i get so confused. on a positive note, i have taken 2 tests and have made a 98 and a 97. my week ended on a good note.

4) nathan is still a youth minister and might i add-he is a might good one at that. we have began to split the girls and guys up once a month so we can talk about specific issues. this past week was our first week to split and it was wonderful. i talked to the girls and nate took the guys. and on top of that, we led worship together for the first time. it was a little shakey but i think that there will be plenty more times for us to get used to it. and who better to sing in front of than the kids who love you the most.

well i think that i have bored you enough. hope you enjoyed and i am going to work on these blogging skills....i need to update a little more. sorry about that.

And A New Chapter Begins...

So I have officially proven that I am an awful blogger. Its been about a month since I wrote last but who can blame me. I haven't had a chance to breathe- those kids ran me ragged. So there is my excuse for not writing in forever.

And speaking of those kids...I miss them. Its weird not seeing at least one of them every day. The phone is a little to quite. Who knew I would miss those guys.

So now that this summer is over a new chapter has began. I have moved to Starkville and am the official owner of an appartment. Yesterday as me and Sarah, my roomate, cleaned and cleaned the thoughts that I am not ready for this kept running through my head. I scrubed the cabinets inside and out and it clicked....Its time for me to grow up. Like it or not, its time. I have to pay bills and buy groceries and well, just grow up.

And as for this appartment, its weird getting used to all the new sounds that a new residence has. I mean our washer and dryer is so loud I think our neighbors can hear it. And our sink practically screams at us when we turn it on. But as for the decorations I must say that our place is quite cute and homey.

So thats all for now. I am off to do a little more decorating. Come see me!

The importance of friends...

I just felt the need to verbalize my appreciation for friends that take time out of their day to just encourage me. I just spend about 2 hours discussing life with Rachel Hinton, a God send I would say. She is a mom and a wife and a youth minister and a devoted Christian on top of all that. Why wouldn't I want to pick her brain? We talked about everything...I mean EVERYTHING and I am so encouraged and feel like I have a new wind after today. How good is our God and how strangly does he work! A year ago I knew Rach as the youth minister's wife of the guy my boyfriend worked for and now here I am working alongside her and getting to learn how to be a better woman because of her. So here's to you Rachie! Thanks for being an encourager, a friend, a Godly woman, and a faithful servant of the Lord. You have impacted my life more than you will ever know.

Psalm 112:9

STRESS!

So have you ever had so much to do not even more hours in the day would help? Well thats how I am. I am cram-packing my days with stuff to do (all productive stuff though) and at the end of the day I still don't seem like I made a dent in what I needed to accomplish. I think it is causing me to go as little insane too. And on top of all that, I haven't seen my girlfriends in 2 months! Now, who does that? I need a major friend va-kay! I think that would do the trick. So all you lovely ladies...bring it on. Well that did it for my venting session for the day. No more complaining...I am off to do God's work.

LATER GATOR!

Welcome to the world of blogging!

So I was always reading other people's blogs and I decided that I would finally start my own and join the blogging craze. An update on this summer so far... I have fallen in love with 30+ girls and can't stand the thought of leaving in the summer. Some days I can't get enough of my job and some days I wonder what God was thinking when choosing me to be in this position. Its so hard and demanding but oh so rewarding at the same time. My girls some how know exactly when I need a hug and when I need to laugh and when I need to be serious. They are so smart and precious. Ok Ok I'll stop...I feel like a proud parent going on and on.

As for the relationship, it has been a very challenging and different time for me and Nathan. We have had to learn to appreciate phone conversations and phone service for that matter. We only see each other about once a month (twice in a good month) and we love that time together. And even more exciting is the fact that we will celebrate 2 YEARS in August. With two years of dating comes lots of big questions and landmarks...Nate will be buying a new car within the month we hope (if i knew how to speak spanish i would say "audious" to the jeep.) Also Nathan graduates in May and that poses a whole new set of questions about the future. But we will get to those in another blog!

So I think this concludes my first real blog. I feel modern and adult-like now that I have blogged! Whoop Whoop!

Until next time...

LOVES!